Archive for the ‘Jokes’ Category
A sexy case
A good friend who has asked us to keep his identity confidential informs us of a possible new case in the Netherlands.
An online retailer (willie.nl) has asked the Dutch Competition Authority (NMa) to investigate the conduct of two wholesalers which would have ceased supplying it with erotic toys and costumes. willie.nl attributes this decision to the fact that it deviated from recommended sales prices. Apparently, the NMa has replied that more hard evidence is needed
The news has also appeared in the Dutch business press.
Nicolas is in Amsterdam today carrying out a field investigation.
(After an intense fight with my inner self I´ve decided to omit links and pictures this time).
Weekend reading and a confession
For those of you who can get some time off to do some reading this weekend, this is a real must: Why (Ever) Define Markets? , by Louis Kaplow.
PS. I was reading last week a piece on the identity of the real people behind many tweets, facebook status updates and posts attributed to celebrities, politicians and others. It made us reflect and feel bad for not having been completely open to our readers. We too have a ghost writer who does most of the work for us. He´s quite shy, but as a exception, has admitted to have a picture taken: here he is.
More competition related entertainment
Our readers are proposing some additional nominations as well as the creation of a new categores for comic books and online games. We are obedient guys and we do what we´re asked, so we´re now beyond movies and looking for nominations on competition entertainment…
Best animated feature
A brief history of the creation of the FTC
Best online game
A visit to the mall, by the FTC
Best competition law comics
Two mangas by the Competition Commission of Singapore: Foiled (Abuse of dominance) and Fixed (price fixing)
O Cartel da Limonada, by the Brazilian Ministry for Justice
Io Non Abbocco, by the Italian Competition Authority
La Breve Storia di Borgo Allegro, by the Italian Competition Authority
Una Brutta Sorpresa, also by the Italian Competition Authority (I´m sure they work on other stuff too over there)
The info on the comics is available at the ICN Blog (thanks a lot to Kartellblog for the pointer!). I´ve actually found quite interesting info in there. An example: anyone interested in doing competition law research in Fiji?
Antitrust Oscars
The significant rise in visits experienced by the blog in the past week (we had close to 3000 visits) has opened our eyes to a reality: there´s a lot of people with free time out there! That’s why, considering that nominations for the oscars were made public last week, determined to fill your spare time with entertainment, and in the spirit of that weird phrase that appears on our header¨”Relaxing whilst doing Competition Law is not an oxymoron“, we´ve put together for you a list of nominees for the best antitrust-related videos on youtube. All of them are really worth watching (although you know that THE RAID is clearly our favorite..)
Suggestions for additional nominations and/or categories are accepted. Vote for your favorite!
Best film by a competition authority
Leniency in cartel cases, by the Dutch Competition Authority.
Be the first to tell; a film on leniency, by the Swedish Competition Authority.
Best antitrust lawyer starred videos
ABA Antitrust Section kicks off year 2010/2011
Best competition law book review
Great video-reviews of the EC Competition Law Handbook 08/09 and of EC Merger Control. Really worth watching; I keep telling Nicolas that this is how he should do his reviews..) They are full of highlights.
Best non-fiction films
The lysine cartel : The real story on which the movie The Informant was based (my favourite scenes are on minutes 1.44 and 2.46). For an interview with the real Mark Whitacre see here
Bill Gates´deposition before the DOJ in the Microsoft trial. In youtube you can find the whole series (for season 1 see here), and also a compilation of greatest hits (the videos give, I think, an unfair portrayal of him so, to balance things here is his great commencement speech at Harvard). Btw, Microsoft´s Steve Ballmer has also starred a short film which escapes any definition
Best politician starred video
Chuck Norris´ Neelie Kroes´ statement (some of the best lines in the history of competition movies) after fining Intel 1 billion euros: “Intel´s latest advertising campaign proposes Intel as the sponsors of tomorrow; well, now they are the sponsors of the European tax payer” and “My vision of tomorrow for Intel, here and now; obey the law“.
The Lisbon Treaty and Competition Policy: A Story of Two Views, by Nicolas Sarkozy and Tony Blair (from 0.40 onwards).
Best non-English speaking video
Apparently (¿?) this video deals with leniency
Best educational video “for dummies”
What is a cartel? (Unfortunately we could not nominate it for the category on best special effects)
¿Por qué la competencia importa?
Best critical video on antitrust
Don´t trust antitrust: the incredible bread machine (watch from minute 2 onwards).
An extra
A video not on competition law, but on competition in law (on 0.37 law school is compared to a situation where “you take a group of alcoholics and then open the bar for three years”, and law students are defined as “insecure, grade obsessed, status obsessed people). It also features Elizabeth Warren, one of the best professors I´ve ever seen in a classroom.
An Antitrust Challenge to God
Almost 9 years ago a U.S. district judge issued a divesture order that, to my knowledge, has not yet been executed. As reported by The Onion, District Judge Elliot Schofield ordered God to break up into smaller deities arguing that HE had “willfully and actively thwarted competition from other deities and demigods, promoting His worship with such unfair scare tactics as threatening non-believers with eternal damnation (…) In the process, He has carved out for Himself an illegal monotheopoly.”
For more info on this case see here http://www.theonion.com/articles/judge-orders-god-to-break-up-into-smaller-deities,404/
It is not the first time that God faces a trial in the US. Some time ago a State Senator from Nebraska lodged a suit againts God arguing that he was responsible for a wide array of catastrophes. You can read the actual suit here, it´s hilarious. http://www.wired.com/images_blogs/threatlevel/files/chambersversusgod.pdf
But legal threats not only come from the States. Within the EU an earthly subsidiary of the ABOVE-mentioned was also sanctioned for abusing its dominant position in the market for funeral services. See here http://www.concurrences.com/abstract_bulletin_web.php3?id_article=520
Strikingly, no one seems to have considered the possibility of challenging God under Article 106. Pursuant to the “automatic abuse” doctrine stated in Hofner-Elser it could be argued that God has attributed himself exclusive rights and is manifestly unable to satisfy demand or prevent catastrophes.
Moreover, and according to Stephen Hawking´s new book that posits that God is not necessary to explain the creation, the conditions laid down in Article 106(2) would not be satisfied! http://www.usatoday.com/tech/science/columnist/vergano/2010-09-06-hawking-book_N.htm
Show Business Competition Policy
In a speech on Friday I alluded to this concept to describe the past five years of competition enforcement. Just thought a picture would help understand.
We Can’t Talk about Pricing…
Skimming through some US antitrust cases I came across an interesting passage that I confess I’d never read before (it’s one of those ‘smoking gun’ sort of things that somehow always catches our eye). This is an unaltered excerpt of the 5th Circuit’s Opinion in US v. American Airlines 743 F2d 1114 United States v. American Airlines Inc L
“For some time before February 1982, American and Braniff were competing fiercely for passengers flying to, from and through Dallas Fort Worth, by offering lower fares and better service. During a telephone conversation between Robert Crandall, American’s president, and Howard Putnam, Braniff’s president, the following exchange occurred:
Crandall: I think it’s dumb as hell for Christ’s sake, all right, to sit here and pound the * * * * out of each other and neither one of us making a * * * * * * * dime.
Putnam: Well– Crandall: I mean, you know, goddamn, what the * * * * is the point of it?
Putnam: Nobody asked American to serve Harlingen. Nobody asked American to serve Kansas City, and there were low fares in there, you know, before. So–
Crandall: You better believe it, Howard. But, you, you, you know, the complex is here–ain’t gonna change a goddamn thing, all right. We can, we can both live here and there ain’t no room for Delta. But there’s, ah, no reason that I can see, all right, to put both companies out of business.
Putnam: But if you’re going to overlay every route of American’s on top of over, on top of every route that Braniff has–I can’t just sit here and allow you to bury us without giving our best effort.
Crandall: Oh sure, but Eastern and Delta do the same thing in Atlanta and have for years.
Putnam: Do you have a suggestion for me?
Crandall: Yes. I have a suggestion for you. Raise your goddamn fares twenty percent. I’ll raise mine the next morning.
Putnam: Robert, we–
Crandall: You’ll make more money and I will too. Putnam: We can’t talk about pricing.
Crandall: Oh bull * * * *, Howard. We can talk about any goddamn thing we want to talk about.
Putnam did not raise Braniff’s fares in response to Crandall’s proposal; instead he presented the government with a tape recording of the conversation.
(Image possibly subject to copyrights: source here)
Chillin'Competition 
